Consequences

Okay, before you go all "Whatev." and roll your eyes, it's different. This isn't the kind of consequences we talked about a while ago. More like a grand-scheme-of-things type of discussion. When sitting down to write a novel, there is an essential question all writers must ask. I think this question is often skipped over. Often unanswered. Often left out--both in the novel and the query letter.

It's the consequence.

And here's the question: What does the MC have to lose if they can't overcome Conflict A, B, or C?

Can you answer this question for your WiP? Can your readers? Is it addressed in your query letter? It should be.

Because everyone wants to pick up a book, read the back, and go, "Oooh, I have to read this RIGHT. NOW. to find out if/how super-awesome MC can overcome that nasty super-bad."

And that's why I'm floundering a little bit in my NaNo novel. I'm not exactly sure what my MC has to lose if he can't overcome the conflict. Maybe because I don't really have the conflict nailed down either...

But that's another post for another day. *wink*

Thoughts on the overarching consequence of your novel? What does your MC have to lose? Internally or externally?

Writing A Query Letter - Part Four: The Consequence

The final element you need in your query letter is the consequence. What will happen if the MC doesn't solve the problem? Doesn't get what they want? Will evil forces achieve world domination? Will her brother die? Is it a race against time across Antarctica to find the long lost jewel of the Nile? What's the consequence?

In the queries I've read, this is what's lacking the most. The consequence. You've hooked me, set me up, explained the conflict that's keeping me from getting what I want, but…what will happen if I don't solve the conflict? That's the consequence. If you're having trouble identifying yours, it's time to go back to the revising stage—in the novel.

Let's examine my query letter in full. (Well, it's not the whole letter; I’m planning a bonus post on Everything Else for tomorrow. Yanno, word count, genre, bio.)

Sixteen-year-old Annie Jenkins must control the magic to balance the realm—it's too bad her unknown abilities are hidden beneath her inhalant addiction.

Whenever she's high, Annie has vivid visions of a death she can't remember and a boy she's never met. When she meets Jonathan Clarke, the ghostly boy from her hallucinations, she realizes her drug use has masked the abilities she's inherited from her magic-keeping mother. Wielding magic isn't everything it's cracked up to be; Annie discovers her newfound powers can't cure her terminally ill mother.

Annie learns she has the rare power to bring immortal beings (Shadows) living in another realm back into the human world. Jon has been searching for someone with Annie’s Mirror power for a century. He's desperate for her to restart his heart so he can become human again, but his Reflection can't be completed until she balances the magic. Their problems double when she learns there are evil Shadows who plan to kill her and take control of the realm. One of Jon's old friends is leading the resistance and attempts to recruit him, while Annie discovers one of her friends is really working against her. If Jon and Annie can't find a way to achieve balance, Reflections and potions won't do any good. There is no spell to revive the dead.

That last sentence is my consequence. You need one to complete the query letter. It should be just as "hooky" as the hook to leave the reader (AKA: agent) salivating to request the full. Also, did you notice how my consequence ties back to my hook? In the hook, Annie has to control the magic to balance the realm, and the consequence directly states what will happen if she doesn't. It's made a complete circle for full closure. That's what you want.

Your job: Separate your consequence from the rest of your query letter. Is it concise? Do you even have one? If not, this is a novel problem, not a query letter problem. Is it a cliffhanger? Enough to entice the reader to want to read the entire book?

Missed the other three parts of a query letter? Click to read The Hook, The Setup, and The Conflict. Tomorrow, I'm posting a bonus post: Writing the Query Letter – Everything Else.